Tequila and Tea

I expected a few things when I joined Millionaire Match.

Ego. Entitlement. A man posing next to a private jet that may or may not be his cousin’s.
What I didn’t expect? A masterclass in tickle fetishes.

It started innocently enough—a flirty message asking if I was “playful.” Sure, I thought. I’m playful. I love deep conversation, spontaneous travel, chocolate in bed.
But then came the next message:

“How do you feel about being tickled?”

I paused. That’s not on my list of love languages.

Then came another.

“Would you ever go to a tickle party?”
And another.
“There’s this amazing tickle apparatus I think you’d love.”
And then the classic:
“Can I see your feet?”

At this point, I wasn’t sure if I was dating or being slowly recruited into a niche club with a secret handshake made entirely of feathers.

Tickle torture. Tickle talk. Tickle tests.
Apparently, I had landed in a hidden layer of the dating internet where “chemistry” is measured in giggles and restraint straps.

My curiosity kicked in. So I did what any normal person would do: I Googled it.

The results?
Tickle fetish is real, it’s deep, and there are forums—entire communities—dedicated to the art of being gently (or not so gently) tickled into oblivion.

I mentioned this to a girlfriend over wine. She blinked, then said,

“You’re braver than me. I’d unmatch at ‘tickle test.’”
Another just shook her head.
“Feathers and feet? Girl, that’s not a soulmate. That’s a sensory experiment.”

Here’s the truth: everyone’s got their thing.
But when it comes to dating—especially in midlife—it’s not just about preferences. It’s about boundaries, communication, and mutual enthusiasm.

You don’t owe anyone your curiosity just because they’re “into something.” You don’t owe access to your body—or your feet—because someone thinks it’s fun.

What I’ve learned is this: Your pleasure matters too.
Not just theirs. Not just their fantasies. Yours. Your safety. Your comfort. Your joy.

My new mantra is: I choose connection that honors my body, my boundaries, and my full being.

Journal Prompt (for those of you who need one): What red flags have I laughed off in dating that actually deserved a full-body no?

Good luck out there! Im rooting for you!